Viewpoint 1

Who you calling a b*tch?

Yes I’m talking to you. You, who think that such a lewd, disrespectful word best describes me. You, who think you have the right to call me out of my name. Out of the thousands of words in the English dictionary, could you come up with nothing better?

I know what you’re thinking, “here goes another girl whose taking this b*tch thing too far.” Let me take a guess, it’s just a word right?

Well you’re right, a word it is indeed. And like every other word, b*tch, has a set of definitions: a female dog; a female of canines generally; a malicious, unpleasant, selfish person, esp. a woman; a lewd woman; a complaint; anything difficult or unpleasant.

As you can see, there is not a thing positive about that word. You can try to change the definition up all you like, but unless you’re name is Webster it does not make a difference.

Why is it that people, black people in particular, like to only pick negative words to refer to each other as? First we all refer to each other as nigger, and now all of our women are b*tches. What, was lovely taken? Does beautiful have too many syllables?

I’m tired of guys thinking that the words “women” and “b*tches” interchangeable. When I was born, the hospital tag on my ankle did not say “Bitch.” My parents were not given balloons that said, “Congratulations, It’s a b*tch!” I constantly hear guys say things like “We’re about to go find some b*tches tonight,” or “That b*tch is fine.”

I AM NOT A B*TCH! Do not tell me it is no big deal because if a guy was to call another guy a b*tch he would be ready to fight, but because I’m a woman I’m expected to take it?

When I ask most of my guy friends why they refer to women as b*tches, they do not even seem to really know, but it has become so second nature to them that they do not want to give it up. I have observed that they often do not even realize they are saying it. When disrespecting a woman becomes an automatic notion, there is a problem.

A lot of females do not like to admit this, but men are not the only ones to blame.  We, as women, have somehow gone from letting men refer to us as b*tches to calling each other b*tches.

We have traded in our womanhood for a derogatory word that was created for creatures who wear leashes. When did this mess become a term of endearment!?

“That’s my b*tch.” “Hey b*tch!” “I love my b*tches!” — I hear women say these phrases and more to their closest friends, we know better.

Somehow women have tricked themselves into thinking that b*tch is a word that embodies a woman of power, strength and independence. I bet that façade fades away as soon as some guy gets mad at you and calls you the very same word that you referred to yourself as five minutes ago.

So in other words, I have to earn the right to disrespect you on a daily basis? Yea, that makes sense. If I am describing you then you might as well stick the label hypocrite to yourself since labels are all the craze now.

What people fail to realize is that words hold power. Teenagers are committing suicide due to verbal harassment everyday, and if you do not think calling someone a b*tch is verbal harassment think again.

Suicide is the third leading cause in teens, and some girls decide they would rather take their life than be verbally abused.

This problem is bigger than most people realize. I have a little sister in middle school, and they are all calling each other b*tches because that is what they see us doing.

We are lowering women’s standards, one b*tch at a time. At this rate our daughters will not know anything different. As women, we deserve better.

There is a reason why you do not call your mother or your boss a b*tch (if you do it’s not to their face), because you know it’s wrong. So do not sit there and pretend it can mean whatever you want it to because it can’t.

An apple is an apple, a teacher is a teacher, and a b*tch is a b*tch — please do not address me as such. And to all my beautiful, black women out there who love this word so much, I would like to quote journalist Amanda Anderson, “be careful what labels you willingly attach yourself to.”

 

 

Viewpoint 2

I would never directly call any individual woman a b*tch. I was raised by a woman, so I understand the power and level of disrespect that word holds.

I also know that men and women live by two different standards and two different codes of law. And what may seem okay in the eyes of men, are not always seen as ok in the eyes of women.

Sometimes, this word happens to fall into that category. However, why should men have to change their way of speech amongst each other just to accommodate to a group of people that they are not even directly talking to? But if it makes you feel better to know why men truly say it, then know that we simply use the term as a general word for women.

Yes, I will be the very first man to admit this is wrong. But this is no different than women referring to themselves as “the baddest b*tch” or even saying things such as “there were a lot of cute guys at the party.” Those “cute guys” have names just like you.

Yet, you do not and probably never will know these men. So why is it okay for men to be classified as cute guys and horny dogs, yet it is disrespect for girls to be sexy chicks and bad b*tches?

The word choice might be different, but the meaning in the eyes of 18-22 year-old men is all the same. To most young men at this age, their idea is of fun is going out and typically finding a woman to have sex with at the end of the night.          Regardless of how many females feel about it, this is the reality of the world we live in. Many of you need to ask yourself, if it makes you feel better if a man says “I’m going to have sex with this b*tch” or “I’m going to have sex with this woman.”

Does it simply sound nicer or do you honestly feel that will make him respect you more? Because in all honesty, many college males are going to think dirty thoughts and attempt to do dirty things, regardless of what their word choice may be amongst their friends.

I am not, nor will I ever be, a fan of disrespect. However, I am also not a fan of sugar coating reality. And the reality of the situation is that men of all kinds use the word. Not all of these men mean it to be disrespectful. Yet, this is how they are treated.

And quite frankly that’s an ignorant assumption. Just because a man uses a certain word does not make him a disrespectful individual. Perhaps he is immature, but that does not automatically classify him as disrespectful.

That is just like assuming every white person that has used the word nigger is racist. That is an unrealistic assumption. Many men use the word as a generalization for a group of people they do not know. Much like many women are doing to me right now as they read (I’m assuming).

Many of my readers do not and probably will not, ever know who I am outside of this paper. However, while reading this article you may be assuming I am a disrespectful individual just because I am not trying to abolish the use of.          Well I assure you, I am not. By the definition of generalization, shouldn’t I be upset that you are pre-judging my characteristics and me?

Yes, there are some individuals who use the term in a disrespectful manner. However, that does not apply to every man that uses the word. I am not condoning the word; I am simply attempting to clean up a misunderstanding between men and women.

If any woman speaks to a man and they call them a b*tch, by all means I encourage you to be upset. At the same time, it would be helpful for women to realize that certain things men say and do amongst each other, are not meant to be understood by you.

That is life.

 In the eyes of a woman, this word only holds one meaning. In the eyes of many men, this word can mean anything. Men do not mean to disrespect you or take you for granted.

 You must realize that if you are not a man then you will not understand what we mean when we say the things amongst one another.

• Sylvia Obell and Tremaine McCaskill